Funny Fart Fails: Hilarious Stories of Embarrassing Moments

Farts don´t usually need to be embarrassing, but sometimes they can go terribly wrong. It could be the wrong time and place, a sluggish stomach, great acoustics, or even the diet. Here are stories of the most embarrassing farts, and what can happen when letting air out. You can read these with a sense of horror or at least feel great sympathy.

Farting in Church Was Embarrassing

I found a story online about someone who had an embarrassing fart during a church ceremony. The person had dropped a handkerchief on the floor during the quietest moment in a wedding ceremony. When they bent down to pick it up, a loud, squeaky fart accidentally escaped. They tried to cover it up by coughing, but the damage was already done. Hopefully, the priest was able to finish the ceremony despite the incident.

Smelly Fart on a Date

This story is about a lucky man who got to walk a girl home after a date. Here´s his recount of that wonderful yet embarrassing experience:

One time I spent the evening with a girl and walked her home afterward. I have a bit of a problem where dairy products cause indigestion, and sometimes a really smelly fart sneaks out despite my best efforts to stop it. Well, it happened – my stomach was cramping, and when I stepped into the elevator, I accidentally let out a fart. We rode up to the 5th floor, which felt like an eternity. We both stood there awkwardly, and I heard her sniff the air once. I think the romantic mood completely evaporated after that, especially considering that I ended up turning back the way I came once she got to her door.

High-Pitched Fart at Work

At work, you have to let the gas out so the day isn’t spent holding it in, but sometimes it can catch you off guard. Here’s one embarrassing fart story from a construction site:

One time, during a farewell party at work, the boss was giving a speech to a large audience. I knew the cake would upset my stomach, but it was so good I couldn´t resist. We were standing there listening to the boss´s long speech when I let out a sharp, wet fart. I wanted to disappear into the floor. That speech probably stayed with the team for a while, or maybe they just remembered my super embarrassing, wet fart.

Diarrhea Fart at the Library

One charming lady shares a rather horrific and embarrassing fart incident that happened at the library:

I went to the library with the boys, and they stayed in the kids´ section while I went to browse the books. Suddenly, I felt an urgent need to go to the bathroom.

I told the boys I’d be right back, but I couldn´t make it to the bathroom fast enough, so I walked slowly but briskly. I could feel something had already leaked, and the accident was happening. I quickly closed the door and sat down. I was wearing a long denim skirt and thong underwear. The underwear was in such bad condition I had to pull them down off the toilet. My thighs and calves were burning from the diarrhea.

I pulled up the skirt and washed up. Thankfully, no one came into the bathroom. I went to find the boys, but as I walked through the library, I noticed a small, suspicious pile on the light-colored tiles near the wall. I just walked past it nonchalantly, as if nothing had happened. I certainly couldn’t clean it up.

I picked up the boys and said we were leaving. They wondered why I wasn’t borrowing any books or videos. I walked quickly out of the library. My skirt had somehow remained clean, and all the mess had fallen out of my thong and onto the floor.

Fart Explosion at the Spring Celebration

Spring is a wonderful time when nature wakes up, and the fresh air fills the earth. It’s also the time for celebrations and speeches. Here’s a funny fart incident from a spring celebration:

I was giving a speech at the spring celebration, and when I got to the last part, I took a brief pause. That’s when all the tension in my stomach from the morning released, and I let out a small but clearly audible fart. I tried to tap the microphone a few times to cover it up, but it was too late. Everyone recognized the loud fart coming from the podium. I was mortified and remembered that moment every day of that summer. The next fall, the fart was a topic of conversation, and I even got a nickname for it. Before Christmas, it was even mocked in the local newspaper.

Poisonous Fart on the Cruise Ship

A cruise is fun, and the buffet offers plenty of delicious treats. But it’s a whole different story if the wrong kind of food upsets your stomach, and when you add the motion of the ship, it creates the perfect storm for a fart disaster. Here’s a story from a recent cruise:

Not long ago, I had an unforgettable experience on a cruise. The food and drink choices were the usual over-the-top variety, as is typical on a ship. I was alone in the liquor store and let out a quiet fart. It didn’t smell at first, so I went to the checkout. I noticed the cashier’s face had turned green, and then I realized the toxic cloud had followed me over there. I could already smell the horrible stench. The cashier quickly rang me up without breathing, threw the items at me, and ran away. I think he went to vomit. I looked around, confused by the terrible smell but didn’t say a word to my cabinmates.

Wet Fart at IKEA

One of Sweden’s wonders is IKEA, and Finns love shopping there too. Shopping as a man is often a painful experience, and when it’s IKEA, the pain is doubled. But when you add a wet surprise in your pants, it turns into an infernally painful shopping trip!

My wife convinced me to go to IKEA in Haaparanta. I reluctantly agreed, because, as is well known, shopping at IKEA is a man´s worst nightmare.

When we arrived at the parking lot, I decided to let out a little gas before going inside, so I wouldn’t smell in the store. I let out a cautious fart in the parking lot, but at that moment, I felt the horror of realizing it wasn’t just air. It was the moment when you feel something wet between your buttocks. I hoped it was just a feeling, but as I walked inside, I was certain that something was rubbing against my back side.

I asked my wife to check if my pants showed anything, and she reluctantly confirmed there was something.

Since we were so far in, I didn’t back out. I went to the bathroom to check. Sure enough, there was a wet fart in my pants, which had even soaked through to the outer pants. I quickly cleaned up with some paper, stuffed some in my boxers, and put my pants back on.

We walked through IKEA, with me hiding my backside, sticking to the walls, but eventually made it through. We quickly went home for a shower. I’m just glad no one could smell it – at least I couldn’t, and luckily, it wasn’t the smelly kind.